I'm Alan Partridge 1- Towering Alan

This is final episode of the excellent series I'm Alan Partridge. Alan is obviously very affected by the events of the previous episode To Kill a Mocking Alan where crazed fan Jed Maxwell pretty much kidnapped him in his horrific fan room!

Click for the quotes from I'm Alan Partridge series 1

Here are the plotlines from I'm Alan Partridge series 1

We open by seeing Lynn trying to calm Alan down with his fears of being assassinated-a hangover from the previous episode. At least he is cheered by the fact that his sleeveless jacket gives the appearance of a bullet proof jacket- the attacker would be forced to take a head shot, and he wouldn't even know what had happened!

Alan is very much cheered by the fact that Chief Commissioning editor of the BBC Tony Hayers has actually died whilst removing an aerial from his roof- Spiceworld- things are looking up for Alan! Even better than that is the fact that Chris Feather, who likes Alan (God knows why) has taken up the role! 

Onto judging the vegetable contest at The Swaffham Country Fayre- he absolutely loves the plums- just put nice plums- but is confused by the protusions from the onions... are they a good things or a bad thing? They would make an excellent murder weapon- beat someone to death then eat the evidence!

Sadly, Alan then attends the funeral of Tony Hayers (you've never looked evil in the face until you've looked into the eyes of the man who has just cancelled your second series). He eventually manages to speak to new BBC boss Chris Feather, who tells Alan that he needs to back on TV- Jurassic Park!

The series ends on a strange note in Chris Feather's office. Chris promises Alan a new 5 year contract with the BBC, on a salary of £200,000 per year... but dies just before he signs it... however, in a sinister way, Alan grabs Chris' hand and signs it anyway! 

So after a terrible start for Alan, at least things are looking up by the end of the series! However, things do change quite alot for Alan Partridge before the start of I'm Alan Partridge series 2

Don't forget to check out the quotes from series one of I'm Alan Partridge.. and use them in your everyday life and see if people notice

I'm Alan Partridge 1- To Kill A Mocking Alan

I'm just a fan Alan, your biggest fan... oh my god Alan always wanted lots of fans but not like crazed superfan Jed Maxwell!

Click to enjoy the quotes from this episode and others from I'm Alan Partridge 1

Click to enjoy the other episodes of I'm Alan Partridge series 1!

So in To Kill A Mocking Alan, we have two major plot lines that converge and explode as if a munitions dump has been hidden under Norwich City Hall.

Scary Irish Men

On the one hand, Alan welcomes two TV executives from RTE in Ireland as they are interested in employing him to host a show in Ireland- der's more to Oireland... den dis... so obviously he is keen to impress them- so much so that he denies living in the Linton Travel Tavern and is similarly incredibly rude to Susan the hotel manager -Tea or coffee... Tea or coffee...

Jed Maxwell- Superfan

The second major plotline is that Alan is putting on An Evening with Alan Partridge with Celebrity Guest Star- Sue Cook... er... just put with Sue Cook... and in attendance is Jed Maxwell- Alan's biggest fan. 

An Evening with Alan Partridge

It's basically a TV show that isn't on TV... Alan hosts a kind of after dinner event where he basically does his Knowing Me Knowing You just without any guests and merely fields questions from his audience- well questions he wants to answer- Has your career gone off the rails a bit... er no not you, the lady behind you... I think most people were there to see Sue Cook, but most stay out of politeness!

When Alan sees the Irish executives (played by Graham Linehan and Athur Matthews the creators of Father Ted) leaving, he desperately runs to stop them in the lobby.

Jed Maxwell's bungalow

Following a brief exchange in the lobby where Alan again denies he lives in the hotel, Jed Maxwell jumps in and says that he lives with Alan in his bungalow- Alan replies... we're not gay! There's nothing wrong with it, but I believe God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. 

When they arrive at Jed's bungalow, he makes them a drink in a coffee jar, a mug, a milk jug and an Ariel-a-tor (something I had forgotten had ever existed!), then Alan accidentally opens the door to the horrific site of his fan room...

I was genuinely scared for Alan! Thankfully he makes a quick getaway, but not before saying- no way you big spastic you're a mentalist! at Jed's suggestion at having a pint next weekend!

I'm Alan Partridge 1:- Watership Alan

This episode Watership Alan provides arguably some of the most quotable Partridge stuff that has ever been written- and we see the birth of the Lady Boy- read on to find out about what those are, although I'm sure many of you will already know! It is episode three in the I'm Alan Partridge first series

Click for the quotes from this episode!

A Room with an Alan
Alan Attraction

Things are starting to look up for our hero. He has managed to land a new gig as the presenter of a promotional boat video for Hamilton's Waterbreaks, but bringing things back down to earth, he is managing to inflame the farmers again... accusing them of producing infected spinal columns... in a bap. 

Initially Alan has been asked to ask his ex wife Carol to film alongside him in the boat video. I find this a little difficult to believe, but it perfectly accommodates Alan and Lynn getting wrapped up together very awkwardly in the telephone cable! During this coming together, Alan 'comes free at the side' but replaces them with the classic 'the boys are back in the barracks!' Instead, he tells Lynn to ring Sol Dangerfield's casting agency and find him a forty year old scorcher!

Ladyboys

When Alan meets the men making the video- expertly played by Simon Pegg and Peter Baynham (affectionately known as Dr. No... vocal chords), we see Alan at his best trying to fit in with these 'lads' from the 1990s. He even creates the finest drinks combination ever made- the Lady Boy- a pint of lager, a gin and tonic and a Bailey's chaser... a drink I have enjoyed many a time, as have most of the Partridgian community! Alan very quickly becomes too drunk to carry on and returns to his room, after which he goes downstairs, has his breakfast, doesn't even wash his hands... cos he's a bloody bloke!

Hamilton's Waterbreaks

While Alan is making the video, we see more classic Partridge quotes such as 'This is a Saniflo 33, and this little babe can cope with anything, and I mean anything. Earlier on I threw in a pound of mashed up Dundee cake, not a trace... piece of mind I'm sure, especially if you have elderly relatives on board..."

Call Cliff Thorburn

Alan is doing well, but obviously the video ends tragically as he is, by the end, trapped under a a dead cow on the boat and is replaced by snooker player Cliff Thorburn... plus he also ends up making the farmer situation worse by angering Peter Baxendale-Thomas, a big posh sod with plums in his mouth, and the plums have mutated and have got beaks (again played expertly by Chris Morris (genius)) to whom he states that farmers make pigs smoke, and keep 20 foot high chickens inside giant sheds that nobody's allowed in...

Click to see the rest of the quotes from this episode!

I'm Alan Partridge 1- Alan Attraction

Michael couldn't have said it better- "Aye Mr Partridge, it's Valentine's Day and love is in the air..." to which we start to see Alan and Michael's strange relationship start to grow as they exchange these pairings where Alan has no idea what Michael is saying, and makes it plainly obvious it is due to his Geordie accent... as he says in A Room with an Alan "Sometimes it is difficult to understand the Geordie... er... people!"

Click here for the Quotes from this episode!

So Alan Attraction... another absolute classic from the Brothers Coogan, Baynham and Iannucci- and I have the feeling that I will be repeating that phrase quite regularly as I wrestle through the Partridge back catalogue.

Chocolate Oranges are Available in Rawlinson's
The episode opens at the end of Alan's breakfast show- Up With the Partridge- where Alan is desperately trying to flog his shop soiled damaged Chocolate Oranges (available at Rawlinson's- I'd love to go there!) and we see more of his radio nemesis Dave Clifton. Clifton at this point seems to be doing very well as he is hosting the breakfast show and looks down his nose at Alan, but Partridgians will know what happens to Clifton over the next few years!

Skeleton Staff at Peatree Productions?
Lynn starts to play a bigger role- advising Alan that unless he makes substantial savings (sacking most people at Peartree Productions) he will be made bankrupt on Friday. Obviously Alan chooses to sack ALL of his staff just so he can have a slightly better car than a Mini Metro- they've rebadged it you fool!

Jill- Do You Like Me Sex Wise?

Despite sacking all of his staff- he still tries his luck with the receptionist Jill- who, he is keen to know 'if the risque comments she makes, is it flirting like middle aged divorcees do... or whether she likes him sex-wise'. When she does we get a classic Partridge 'I'm Batman!'. Soon after, when Jill inquires as to the whereabouts of the rest of the staff, Alan replies that they had gone celebrating, not with the Spice Girls, but at Longstanton Spice Museum!

A Turn for the Worst...

An exciting day follows in the local Owl Sanctuary, followed by a romantic buffet dinner at the Travel Tavern, not from an 8 inch plate, but from a 12 incher! The climax of the evening comes in Alan's room where he had somehow managed to coax Jill upstairs, but he is exasperated by her when she gets chocolate mousse on Alan, the bedspread, the vallance (the skirt thing round the side of the bed...) and that was the end... Jill's contract had been... terminated!

Back of the net! A great second episode in this amazing series and you feel that after episode two- the series is really gaining pace and is the perfect sequel to Knowing Me Knowing You. 

I'm Alan Partridge 1- A Room with an Alan

During I'm Alan Partridge, we start to see more of Alan's off screen character. Particularly in A Room with an Alan, he provides us with a great range of quotable material and jokes- one of my favourite
episodes...

Click to see the BEST quotes from this episode!

Plotlines
So A Room with an Alan is the first episode in the first series of I'm Alan Partridge, and after the first 2 minutes, we start to realise just how deep Alan's fall from grace has actually been! He is ploughing the graveyard shift on local Radio Norwich, and after leaving his wife Carol, he is living in the Linton Travel Tavern.

Upon Alan's entry to the hotel, it represented a great opportunity to intro all of the characters for the series ahead including Dave Clifton, the smug DJ from the infinitely more popular breakfast show, the smily hotel manager Susan, hotel worker Sophie (expertly played by Sally Phillips) and the wonderful odd job man Michael. This is not to mention the introduce of Alan's PA Lynn Benfield, with whom it quickly apparent that Alan treats her like a rubbing rag.

House Viewing
But things are not all bad for Alan... he has a big house viewing upon the horizon- his 5 bedroom bastard house! The sequence where Alan views this potential new abode is one of my absolute favourite bits of the whole of Partridge. Quotes like... 'What's this little sink... a rinser... get rid of it" and "Yes it's an extender!" have gone down in Partridge folklore. Eventually very happy with the house, partially because it has a Buck Rogers toilet that flushes on the first yank... he puts in an offer (£324,000 when it was on for £325,000) and the house is his... or is it? The estate agent plays along a bit with Alan's madness, but when he says he loved Alan's TV show, but doesn't get the A-ha reference, we know he is lying! He was never a Partridgian!

BBC Meeting with Tony Hayers
This is the first point where we feel badly sorry for Alan. Tony Hayers, played by David Schneider, completely wrecks Alan's dreams when he denies him a second series (interspersed with shots of Alan's lap dancing dreams...). He then completely tears apart all of Alan's programme ideas- incidentally many of which have actually been made- including Swallow, A Partridge Amongst the Pigeons, Cooking in Prison and the hilarious Monkey Tennis, until Alan's arguably suffers his first minor mental breakdown by stabbing a huge cheese with his fork and running back through the BBC to his car and the watchful gaze of Lynn his PA.

In an sad ending, we see Alan hanging around the house he can no longer afford, comforted by Lynn... he states that 'that was a negative and right now I need 2 positives..." one of which is the ability to get an irish coffee delivered to his room in the Travel Tavern...